Where is the hotel?

just a thought...on pain meds

this relates to my rant the other day about too many choices. well sarah clued me into a good article on the "tyranny of choice". check it out here.

today i was in the drug store. and there they are, like 150 different pain meds staring me in the face. it's not for me. my friend says "i like the rapid release Tylenol". well... who the fuck doesn't? i mean who wants their pain meds to be released slowly. i understand that things change. like i said. i am not a luddite. so great! hooo ray. they have invented a pill system that gets that shit into your veins and up to your head or your throbbing thumb lickety split. hoo ray. what i don't get and really (obvs) drives me up the wall is... why not get rid of ye olde original tylenol the one that was the slower releasing variety. i mean, we don't need it. now that we have rapid release, we're good. and when we get hyperspace speed tylenol. let's dump the rapid release. it's pretty simple.

yesterday i was fascinated by someone else

mind blowing DIY weekend still in progress.

st vincent on friday night.

she is playing the guitar.

she has a mic'ed piece of wood that she stomps the beat on.

and she sings. i mean s-i-n-g-s. diy, personified.

post show birthday texting.

saturday. saturday! we were so lucky to be blown away. amazed. brought to tears. inspiredbeyond anyones wildest, wildest dreams. thanks to aaron rose and his powerful movie, beautiful losers i really feel like my life has been intensified. i think everyone in that theater had to fight the urge to walk out of there in the middle of that film and find the nearest art supply store and stock up for the winter. you can not wait to see this film about some of the artists that came out of the alleged gallery in the early 90's. that's bullshit and makes this movie sound so lame. cause they are still around today and as incredible as ever. just google it or something. i don't have the patience to list all these people that you should know about. i was sitting next to jessie totally jealous that she is getting to see this movie when she is 21 23(what's the dif?). how lame is that?

the film makers. thank you.

this was all part of the swerve festival and it was fun. outside jessie was making temp tattoos on people with sharpies and there were tons of friends all around. it was the LA weekend i have been missing all summer long. it was radical to spend so much time hanging outside. and that's the difference. in LA we can hang outside.

and then there was this dude. cali's friend's, little bro. how awesome is he? first of all he made that skateboard at the fest earlier in the day. secondly, he stole those ear protectors from some table. third, he fearlessly shredded that hill. but this is the best part... i am dropped off at the coffee place by cali while he is trying to park. this kid, gabriel is his name, kid sounds better tho. the kid comes in and says "there you are. i asked some people out front if they saw a hippy dude around, they pointed this way" i bought him an iced tea. oh, and later he asked if i was mike's boyfriend. "he wishes", i said.

his skateboard says "stonz" at the top and "king" at the bottom. that character on it is saying something about someone being "sexy". it's awesome when you find kids like this. the ones that bum you out cause you won't get to be friends with them when they are like 25.

i got a text message tonight. it said "see you tommorrow. i am excited to be in LA again." who wouldn't be?

(sigh)

i would like to marry kirsten dunst. i love her,, snaggletooth and all.

heaven.

it's 4:01 am. i have been looking at photos of her on the internet for 2 hours or so.

with sunlight around my skin turns brown

the problem right now, at this moment, is that when i am out and it's getting on 11 pm i am sleepy. but as soon as i get home i am not. i am chock full of insomnia. it's frustrating and annoying. both of those things.
should i buy a tv tomorrow? maybe i will if they take checks. i guess i should really paint that wall first. but i haven't decided which of the white i am going to paint the wall in this room. this is the problem. we live in a time when there are too many choices. there are way too many beverages to choose from at trader joes. have you seen that juice section? i mean isn't apple and orange enough? and what about the vitamin aisle? jesus. and all the channels on the tv and the sattelite radio in my rental car. it's overwhelming. but it really gets ridiculous at the hone depot paint section. do i want vermont cream? maybe powdered snow is better. but what about billowy clouds? which one will go best with sea salt which is what i am painting the trim? too many choices. and i am not even a luddite! i mean i love my digital camera. i love technology. i love my flat screen tv i am going to buy. but why can't there just be one shade of white paint or maybe just ten. that would make this process easier.

another thing i have been thinking about.... that totally harsh billboard near the glendale blvd and scott street intersection. i don't have a photo of it. it's for a strip club somewhere in LA called "the playpen". and it's got a woman's head but maybe she isn't a woman. maybe she's a man in drag. but she's definitely supposed to be a woman. and she has a ring of black lip iner around her lips and it just looks, for lack of a better word, retarded. it doesn't look appealing. it doesn't look sexy. it just looks retarded. and gross. definitely gross too. i always wonder if the women that work there know about this billboard. cause i don't think they would be too happy if they did. i think they'd complain to management that it misrepresented them. i would think they would say something along the lines of "take that motherfucker down! i don't want to look like some skanky ho that just drank a gallon of grape juice and didn't wipe my mouth. wait make that a skanky, sloppy, drag queen stripper! i am not that, i am an exotic dancer." for some reason i keep thinking about that retarded billboard.

well, my friend annie is in town shooting a music video. and playing some shows. she is my first house guest! asleep in my new bed as i write this on the aerobed on the floor. i love video shoots. well, i don't really, they are pretty tedious. i like the lights at them though. this one is gonna look amazing.

her 9 year old brother thomas is in it!

i want this background. actually, how awesome would it be to have this whole scene for your living room?

and what about the "sunset on a lake" light? i want that too.

kime and i sat around for hooooours, well really like 90 minutes. taking sunkissed photos of ourselves at 9:30 PM.

oh yeah! speaking of buzzelli. she commented in my last post about looking so bad, "tales from the crypt" i think she said, that it made her not care about her tumor. well she could have it worse! she could look like old uncle monty from texas chainsaw massacre, aka my landlord. we saw him get his legs chopped off on tv the other day! it's awesome watching your landlord get his legs sliced off with a chainsaw. it'd be better if he was a prick.

see, it can always be worse.

you could be known as "fat kid".

i've been out walking

this is two minutes from my house.

thanks los angeles parks department

this is 15 minutes from my house.

thanks barry mcgee.

this was the best show i have ever seen.

thanks melvins.

i'm losing my will.

what have i been doing?

buying t-shirts on ebay. painting my apartment. seeing bands play. taking care of sick people. ignoring myself and what's good for me. relishing being at home. worrying that my car might not make it to it's next destination. walking scout. thinking of ultimatums. soliciting advice. ignoring it.

freight train running through the middle of my head

Sometimes its like someone took a knife baby
Edgy and dull and cut a six-inch valley
Through the middle of my soul

you think you're the only one?

thanks to the matablog for the reminder that things could always be worse.

i'll let you decide which part is the best.

if i could settle down, then i would settle down

**now it's been announced: meg white is suffering from "acute anxiety" so the white stripes have cancelled their tour. get well soon, please for your sake and mine and 35 others. our favorite jobs just vanished in thin air.**

okay. so i have some news that i am afraid to put on the internet. i don't want to be the first one to spill it. it's a matter of professionalism.
let me just say that it's true. the grass is always, always greener. because now that i have something i always think i want (namely, time at home) i am sort of bummed about it. plans fall through. things change. i should be psyched to get my apartment in order. but that was slated to happen in nov. i was happy to have time to think about the things i wanted to do. happy to take it slowly, this moving in. but now, instantly, it's staring me in the face. and not just the apartment, but other facets of my life. demanding to be put in order, no longer relegated to weeks away.
this is a big deal. these things come gradually to most people.... paying a bill here or there, unpacking, buying a tv, moving on. i only have short periods of time to get these things taken care of. so when that is in my face hyper space speed. it feels heavy and scary.
i wanted to drive through yellowstone.

so selfish.

revisited

seriously.
just listen to this. i mean. just buy it or rip it or whatever. own it though.

it makes you not want to die.
but only cause it makes you want to walk theearth for eternity.